Skip to main content

Chapter 2 - Del seeks relief in additives and enhancers and only finds misery

 

THE STORY OF DEL - Delete

Well, Del's spirit took a plunge and - like so many other superannuated components of the Tech industry - he foolishly sought the relief of additives and mood-enhancers: pills, powders, potions, pellets, snuffs, sprinkles, beverages... and even gels! 


 
For a couple of months he was above it all, happy and high, but then the law of diminishing returns kicked in and - as expected - he hit the skids. REAL HARD. From the warm and tidy keyboards he had once called home, he was out on the wild streets doing rough deals and sharing tweets & needles with perfect strangers.

Well, not everyone was a stranger. On rare occasions he'd bump into a few other banished keys, like CTRL Almighty and Sexy ALT.

Oh what a team they had once been! Back in the day, the three of them together 'CTRL-ALT-DEL' had packed a bigger wallop than 20 straight tequilas followed by a sucker punch from Mike Tyson. Only the Commodore Amiga's legendary 'Guru Meditation' could compare in its approximation of death.







Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Chapter 1 - From Keyboard Reject to Action Hero

THE STORY OF DEL - Delete Once upon a half-life ago, there was a guy called Del. That was his nickname, short for Delete. And he was a reliable, hard-working key on most of the world's computers. A straight-forward and regular sort of guy, he was never more prominent than any of the letters he had been charged to kill, no fatter than an 'i', no skinnier than a capital 'W' - unlike Backspace who was super-sized and flaunted a Nike-style arrow pointing hard-left ←. Some hardware companies, like Lord Macintosh, had refused Del right from the get-go, preferring to farm out his tasks to a combination of other workers like 'Function-Delete,' with 'Delete' on Sir Mac actually being Backspace ←. But then one day, for Del - the original Del - things took a bad turn, real bad! And it happened at the speed of a toilet flush vortex! Millions upon BILLIONS of small handheld flatscreen devices suddenly began to spill from the heavens - the 'STPs' - smartph...
Post a Comment
Read more

Chapter 26 - For scribes and writers, the biggest design fail came from the best designer of all time!

                      THE STORY OF DEL - Delete "Hi Del, how are you feeling today?" "Still kicking, Juula." "Where were we?" "You were talking about the 4 main reasons for bothering to select text, which on handhelds, is mostly done by dragging mini-handles - a real bummer." "Right. For writers and scribes, it represents the biggest design fail of all times. Sadly foisted on humanity by the greatest design genius of all times." Minihandles! - Yecch! "All right, let's focus on deletion. Remember this?" Merry splinter Kleenex guardrail whippersnapper tear Boeing shoebox Christmas "Yes." In the preparatory "selection" phase, before effectuating the obvious deletion, it becomes this:" Merry splinter Kleenex guardrail whippersnapper tear Boeing shoebox →Christmas "What do you notice?!  "For deletion, the only text I'm interested in is the one just beyond the end of the selected words!...
Post a Comment
Read more

Chapter 27 - If it takes you more than one touch to cancel to the end of a sentence, you're working too hard.

                       THE STORY OF DEL - Delete " Buongiorno Del! Come va ?" " Bene bellezza, mia . What do you have for me today?" "We're gonna reason a few things through regarding text editing on handhelds." "For instance? "Well, when discussing anything, it's always a good idea to provide some givens. For example:" 1) Compared to the ease of selection on regular computers, with their big physical keyboards, mice, shift-arrows and function keys, highlighting text on the flat screens (phones, tablets and phablets) is torture. "Definitely! But the problem is the handhelds are basically content-retrieval systems." "Maybe they are now, but they don't have to be. No, it's entirely a matter of poor design. Excuse the vulgarity, but piss-poor design!" "I have good reason to believe you, mi amor!" "The second given:" 2) When editing, the writing part can happen at the variable speeds of ins...
Post a Comment
Read more