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Chapter 4 - Del is working on something REAL BIG - but the bouncer doesn't get it

 

THE STORY OF DEL - Delete

Even in his messed-up state, Del knew it was decidedly wrong to ruin someone's $320 Carré d’agneau de Pauillac rôti en cocotte gâteau d’aubergines for any reason whatsoever…


...let alone with a ghastly spectacle of 'Turds sur la Lawn,' but there was an obsessed method to his madness, a reason behind it all that made him talk back to the cops and bouncers who'd promptly hustle him off the premises. No! He wasn't merely defecating on private property, no, no, no! It was for a noble cause, it was high-tech... it was research... it was... it was…

Once, while being hauled away, he even told the strapping bouncer that he could understand and forgive the equivocation. He himself had run a Google search and in all of human history - surely a very long time! - only 423 people had ever called crapping outside expensive restaurants 'High-Tech' or 'Research.' 423 out of the 107 billion people calculated to have ever lived on Planet Earth gave Del's claim only a zero point 00000000395327102803 per cent chance of corroboration...


...so yes, he understood the man's misgivings and had no trouble forgiving him.



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